Farewell Muffin Buffin

I woke up to a heart breaking text this morning, my cat passed away last night. She had been acting weird the past couple of months but she was a seasoned lady so I figure maybe she had a cat form of dementia. In hindsight we should have figured she was nearing the end of her life, she started sleeping on my moms bed last week, something she hasn’t done in years.

We adopted Muffin in 2003.

My friend’s cat escaped and came back pregnant. I begged my mom for one of the kittens and after days and hours of begging she agreed to let me have one if I took care of it. We went to my friends house to pick out a kitten and my mom immediately wanted one that was all white, that kitten was spoken, but there was a tiny grey and white kitten we could have and we named her Muffin.

Muffin was the runt if the litter, while we were observing the kittens I witnessed her being crowded out by her brother and sisters when they were eating. When she finally got a spot her mom got up and walked away. She was also the smallest, she had big paws so we thought she was going to grow into a big cat, but she was always small for a cat.

Once we got her home we put a cage in my room full of blankets and I took responsibility for caring for her. But to my anger and dismay, she was so loveable that my mother and brother also fell in love with her. So I couldn’t have her 24-7.

Muffin had some quirks that were adorable. She was cross eyed, walked side ways, and would sometimes try to get the kitten in the mirror that she didn’t realize was her. When she was put down for a nap in her cage everyone knew when she woke up. She would yell and climb the cage and hang on to the top like she was Tarzan.

We had a cat when we brought Muffin home. Muffin tried to be her friend but she(Honey) was not having it. On one hilarious occasion Muffin killed a mouse then Honey stole it and tried to take credit for the kill. We eventually had to separate them, they would take turns in the basement while the other got to roam the house. We did this until Honey died.

When I went away to college Muffin basically became my moms pet. My mom would joke that she was my cat that got foisted on her. She would tell me to take Muffin home with me.

My mom adored her though, she’d never let me take her. Muffin became a princess after me and my brother left home. She had a princess dish and dish mat. She had fancy cat carriers and cute little cat outfits, one which you can probably guess was a princess outfit.

It was at this point Muffin became spoiled. She’d demand attention, she’d only eat wet food and she even had preferences with that. Fancy Feast was her food of choice. She’d go on hunger strikes if she didn’t get her preferred food.

Later on in her life Muffin became more loving and relaxed. Shed curl up in my lap for hours or hang out on my shoulder when I held her like a baby. She did this cute thing where she’d give you a cat kiss. She’d smell your mouth, I read they do this to catch your scent but she would mostly do it when you gave her kisses so I’m anthropomorphizing her actions even if it isn’t true, which I believe it is.

The last time I saw Muffin she begged for attention and I ignored her, that is tearing me up right now. I know it was probably inconsequential to her but I’ll never get to hold her again, never get to hear her loud purrs as I stroked her. I’ll never get to talk to her and ask about her day. We had conversations, she would answer my questions with different meow tones and durations, she’d tell on my mom if she was being mistreated.

I’m going to miss Muffin, I came to my moms house today and her dish was gone. That was too real a moment for me and I feel like sobbing right now.

I can take comfort in the fact that she didn’t die alone. My mom told me she let out a meow she never heart before so she picked her up and held her. Muffin knew she was dying it doesn’t sound like she wanted to go. She meowed and meowed until my mom held her against her chest the way I described earlier. She rested her head on my moms shoulder and calmed down. My mom then cradled her like a baby and she gazed into my moms face until she passed. I’m glad she was knew she was loved before she passed.

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